I’m Behind On Everything – Life, Anime and Manga… What Comes Ahead

That’s pretty much how it is. I am struggling to get back after my short depression in April and beginning of May but it is hard. I knew it would be like this but it is frustrating. I want to be back to normal again, preferably yesterday if I could decide. I can’t so I better just be patient and work slowly to catch up.

I have more or less dropped every anime I watched by now. I know I wrote it in an earlier post too, that all I watched was Magical Girl Site but, not even that anime is on my watch list anymore. Nothing is. I feel a bit of a failure actually, not being able to keep up with at least one show is kind of bad. Sure, I got ill for a little while and dropped more or less my whole life down a hole but one show shouldn’t be too hard to maintain. And now I can’t muster the strength to pick it up and finish my project. It sucks. Royally even.

As for manga then. Well, I buy them. And read them. I have read more manga than I have watched anime at least. It’s relaxing and somehow I have the ability to concentrate even though it shouldn’t be possible. Or so they say, when you are depressed you normally can’t. Well, reading manga is a good way to run away from the darkness. And, as you know if you have read this blog for a while, buying manga eases my anxiety. I have been meaning to write reviews for the manga I read for my #TBR but that is still to happen. Over all has #MYNAME been completely neglected.

Maybe, most likely, part of my depression is a part of me going all in when I started this blog. Looking back it is easy to see how I was in a high, writing all those posts, putting my whole soul into this and not rest from it at all. Nothing of what I have written here (except one post) has been pre-posted. I never schedule anything. I write on an impulse and just throw it out there, often raw. I should probably change my strategy a little bit but it is hard to get an old dog to change.

Well, if I would say anything about the future of this blog then. Who the hell am I trying to fool? I will always swing in the chandelier, going on a rollercoaster. There will still be episodes of twenty posts a week and three posts the next. I can’t predict anything really so plans are not something I should even think about. People tell me pretty often, routines are a good thing. Yeah, I have tried those. It’s a fancy word, routine, I think about it sometimes. It’s more like I associate it with Yuri Plisetsky than with me and my life. So, expect no order at all for the next eternity.

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I had planned on writing about my digital manga haul in this post. I guess I’ll do that in the next one instead.

22 thoughts on “I’m Behind On Everything – Life, Anime and Manga… What Comes Ahead

  1. Depression is a miserable experience and not something that can be fixed by thinking positively or having a routine or whatnot. It’s a biochemical problem, and requires the aid of a doctor, or maybe just a counselor in some cases. Speaking from my own experience here. With the right help, you can beat it back and enjoy living. Just don’t try to do it on your own and without support, as too many depressed people do.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Depression sucks but I am used to it and in the end it always turns around. I’m bipolar so this is just one of many. I do have my own doctor who I see regularly and a very supportive family so I am not alone in this. Thank you for your concern. โค

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m very glad to hear that you have good story support. And thank you for being open about your experiences on your blog. Rooting for ya!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m glad you feel a little better but it’s perfectly reasonable to be exhausted. I mean when you start feeling guilty about not watching anime something’s off… I’m sure everyone, like me, will be happy to get any Lina we can whenever you feel like it.
    (I love Squee)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. โค I started to rewatch Free! instead of thinking about why I didn't want to watch the spring anime. Somehow it feels a lot better to watch something my brain has already seen once before. Strange how healing halfnaked boys can be. ๐Ÿ˜Ž

      (Squee! ๐Ÿ˜)

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Glad to see that you’re feeling any bit better. There’s nothing wrong with feeling burnt out with a medium, so not watching anime for a while isn’t anything to feel guilty over, I’ve known a ton of people who’ve had to take breaks.

    By the way, Squee is rad.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Squee is the cutest. ๐Ÿ˜Š

      Thank you. I know but I still feel, annoyed might be the right word for it, that I am. Ah well, I started to rewatch Free! instead and it seems to be rather healing to my brain to watch something it is already used to since before. There is hope after all.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. That could be an option. I’m to much of an impulsive writer though. I need to get my thoughts out the minute I have ended the post. I have tried to schedule posts before and it ended with me going in and end the schedule by myself beforehand anyway. ๐Ÿ™„ But is def is a good thought.

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  4. Coming out of a low is always hard since you have the urge to catch up. Take your time, enjoy what you want to watch and/or read. This blog is also for your enjoyment so don’t feel any pressure to post or have a certain amount to post. Do what will make you happy and bring you enjoyment. Then you’ll find yourself slowly getting back into more things.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have started to rewatch Free! again (as you already know) and somehow it is healing for my brain I think. Just the fact that I already know the characters and is familiar with the surroundings makes it a whole lot easier to watch. Also, naked boys. ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ˜‡ No, but to be serious, I think it is good for me to just keep to simple things. As for the blog, I do have just one must right now and that’s will be my Friday (weekend) post about the hot boys. Other than that it will be what it is.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I need to finish Free! too lol. That is good and I’m sticking to the same. I do vary between how many posts I have a week, but I still try to get my Friday one in too. We do what we need to to get by and it works.

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  5. Don’t feel bad about it. I’m way behind compared to every anime fan on here. I understand feeling down or being burnt out. Trust me, I was burnt out on anime, music and especially mainstream movies which is why I focus on obscure things more often than not. I hope you feel better.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! I am focused on stuff I have already watched at the moment. It takes the pressure of my brain it seems. I already know the characters and the surroundings and don’t have to spend time on understanding and get to know them. It’s nice for a change. When I feel like it I throw in some of the new stuff but it rarely happens. I am way after everybody else to but I refuse to think of it as a problem. I have never been interested in keeping up to begin with. This season was my first in doing so. It was more of an experiment than anything. I have found that you get readers to your blog no matter if you write about old or new anime. That is nice.

      Oh, congratulations on your books getting published. I hope they do well!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome. I’m in the same boat more often than not when it comes to watching things. At least half the anime I’ve reviewed involved stuff I’d already seen before (sometimes multiple times).

        Thanks, Lina! I hope so, too.

        Like

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