Crappy: Mars Attacks – But They Are Humans?

What the fuck Japan? Since when did humans originate from Japan? And why isn’t humans from Earth but from Mars? And who are these earthlings anyway? And why is Shinji in this crappy anime? So many questions, so few answers (make that zip, zero, none).

Yeah, another crappy anime seen;ย Hametsu no Mars. This one’s not only crappy according to it’s score on MAL (2.33) but also in my opinion trash. Fortunately it’s only 19 minutes long. 19 very long minutes I might add.


So, what’s this garbage about then. Well, Shinji, sorry, Takeru is a highschool student who has been forced to, against his will by his father Gendo (fuck wrong anime), wear a robot suit called an Eva (damn it, wrong anime again) called MARS. Earth is invaded by these Angels (for fucks sake Lina, get a grip) Ancients that are fighting humanity for some unknown reason. Shinj…Takeru has some girl soldiers at his aid that are more or less useless in killing these Ang…Ancients since Sh…Takeru is the only one who can kill them. Anyway, this robot thingy MARS is made out of scrap metal from a space craft/vessel/thing that crashed in space (I am gonna take it when they tried to enter the atmosphere). It is a bit unclear why they crashed and how they got all the pieces down from space but they did and they built this robot suit and forced poor, protesting Takeru into it.

Oh no, she lost her head!! And then they all howled “Takeruuuuuu” because an Ancient pierced him with a sword.

I don’t know, it’s just stupid. There are monsters or what not called Ancients wreaking havoc in Tokyo (or possibly the world) and kids who are supposed to kill them. There is a scientist who is trying to figure out the origin of said monsters. The kid in the suit is chosen because of his DNA.

Takeruuuuuuu!! He is fancy with his neon lights and flashy sword.

What can I say, if Neon Genesis Evangelion is a masterpiece this is the excrement they left behind when they cleaned up after the angels were gone.

But the music is absolutely amazing. It’s classical music from the great masters; Beethoven, Chopin, Satie. That I have to give them, the music is a 10. The rest, not so much.

If you for some strange reason want to see this crap you can find it on YouTube.

16 thoughts on “Crappy: Mars Attacks – But They Are Humans?

  1. This sounds totally awesome! I want to see this right now ! This has got to be the hottest thing ever since Neon Genesis Evangelion. You must be mistaking right? A score of only 2.33? I think it’s 233….yeah, sorry you are wrong about this. I hope I can watch this tonight. But my reader exploded and there is something that has gone seriously wrong with my comments section. Wonder what that is about ๐Ÿค”๐Ÿค”

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Lol….I thought that is what this was. I’m protected though: Asta is hear screaming all the way as I stand ready to destroy him. That’s pretty much enough to scare the Ancients away ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Is it even possible to wish that something only 19 minutes was shorter? This was like a horrible anime version of the outer limits, lol,With the twist at the end.

    Your right though, it screams nge. “Here’s a plasma rifle. It will take time to recharge so you have to hit it in the first shot.” ” What if I can’t? ” “don’t think about that (Shinji).” When he gets in the mars he has to step inside a giant cross. Like come on!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know right!! I am impressed you actually watched it. ๐Ÿค— On the other hand, i would have too if I had read my post. ๐Ÿ˜Ž I’m too curious not to. But yeah, seriously, 19 minutes is way to long for crap like that. I wished Pupa’s episodes were full length episodes and here I wished it was only 4 minutes long. ๐Ÿ™„

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well, Pupa is kind of nasty. Even for someone who likes gore it can be a bit too goreish. (is that even a word?) So you do the right thing and don’t watch it. I don’t recommend anyone to watch it actually. Unless you really, really like people who eat other people while moaning oniichan, oniichan and rub themselves at their wailing brother. Then maybe.

        Liked by 1 person

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